I don’t think anything can emotionally prepare you for a phone call saying a dear friend and mentor is having trouble breathing.

Or for arriving on the scene seconds after the ambulance – and seeing a still body on the ground. Every fiber of your being tense, worried, hopeful, terrified.

Nothing compares to the huddle of people all praying for the life of their friend. The fervent feeling in the room, the hush so deep you can hear a pin drop.

The sound of a defibrillator, and voices of the firemen, “Clear.”

These are the moments that are seared into our brains.

The tight embrace of a sobbing body – frail and heaving from the emotional exertion of the thought of losing a father – Giving all the comfort I can to a young woman who while not related to me, is as much a sister to me as my biological family.

The tiny whisper from a dry throat, “They found a pulse…”

The wave of relief, the choked back tears: I will never forget these moments.


I like bacon. And other curious truths…

Seriously, I LOVE bacon… So basic American I know… I also love breakfast. All breakfast foods. Except quiche with broccoli. That is gross. Anything with broccoli is gross… And no, I can’t just pick it out. The taste lingers!

If you ever wondered why I don’t post much -well, I try to post about big things that happen to me, but apparently my perception of “big things” means earth shattering things that will probably never happen… hence why I never post. Buuuuuuuut… there have been some things that I *should* have posted about. because to me, they’re… basically the best. Yes, even better than bacon! One of them being that JoAnna and I celebrated our seventh month dating anniversary! Which… is awesome. I can’t even think about how life was before her! Mostly… it was boring.

Now for some rather mundane facts:

I’ve been gainfully employed for over 547 days.

I’m currently car shopping. Which I do not enjoy.

I’m growing my beard out again.

Also food.



I’m like that old hermit who only comes out of his hidden home to give words of wisdom to those rare folks who adventure deep into the creepy woods and over the suncracked mud of the badlands. Only… I’m just ramblings, not being helpful.

You know what sucks? Self control. Like you really want that last brownie but your brain has a conversation that goes something like: “Oh, I want that! Buuut…. I shouldn’t… Oh, I’ll just work it off later! Buuut…. I don’t really want to workout so that won’t happen. I just won’t eat it. … … … Who am I kidding? That brownie is mine! DIBS!” And then you eat it and then next time you try on your favorite pair of pants they don’t fit. Moral of the story, brownies are evil. Nah, just kidding. But for reals, self control is like way hard. It’s also really satisfying. And then there is self control’s comrade – Perseverance. He’s kinda hard to get to stick around, but once he’s there he usually stays for a while. So if you’re gunna quote me, here is the ‘Too long, didn’t read’ version. ‘Self control and Perseverance seem like cool people.Go make friends with them.’

Life recently has been…. Well it’s been life, ya know? Unpredictable, wearisome, amazing, energizing, scary, exciting and every other adjective one could think of.

Some days you wake up and it’s a miracle you get out of bed at all, other days the second you open your eyes you’re ready to take on the world. Sometimes you’re stuck in a rut for days at a time and sometimes you’re practically walking on clouds. Crazy how that works.

You know what else is crazy? That I’m going to be 20 next month… Kinda blows my mind. So is the fact that I have simply the most amazing woman who embarked on the  wildest adventure with me… JoAnna, if you’re reading this – You are a wonderful human being and when you smile, a butterfly hatches somewhere in the world!

Ever been socialonely? That’s when there are people all around and you’re not actually alone, but the one person you want to hang out with isn’t around so you’re just lonelys Yeah, that’s me sometimes.

Have you ever thought about what you would say if by some chance you got famous and went on a talk show? Yeah, I have. I would amuse myself at least.

So yeah, life’s been happening and I’m doing my best to hold on.







January 1st…

The start of a new year. Every year I wonder why everyone makes such a huge fuss over it. Why rush the journey to eternity? Do they actually care about bettering themselves and those around them? Do they care about changing the world, or is it just another excuse to get wasted and get paid for it.

As I sit on my bed, having just finished day 1 of my MacArthur daily Bible(A Christmas gift) I can’t help but be completely overwhelmed with how much God has blessed me. How much I’ve changed for good or how much I have stayed the same – For bad.

It’s just after 2, I have the day off and I’m enjoying the quiet, the fact that I could sleep in. I wish for a cup of tea, but I don’t feel like getting up and making it. I have a blog post to write after all. How petty.

From the other room I hear one of my sisters singing Silent Night. The mumbled words that she doesn’t quite remember, but the clear and joyous chorus. I am humbled – I want my praise to be like that. Sure it gets messy and maybe I don’t remember some of the words, but the chorus – What we always return to, the repeated stanzas that echo in our minds, I want to sing it with no shame! I want my life to be ablaze with my love for Christ! That’s what the new year means to me – forgetting my mistakes of last year, and in the new? Laughing, learning, growing, praising, giving thanks.

Happy 2016!

– Cheers.





365 days

Eeyup, it’s been 365 days since I started this blog… Not all that much to show for it really.

I didn’t even manage to post once per month. But hey, that’s the past, right? We have a new year on its way and with it – new beginnings. I honestly rarely make new year resolutions because I know myself and for the first few weeks it’ll be cupcakes and dandelions – and then I totally fail whatever and think to myself, “Self… I can’t believe I tried to not [insert whatever] for almost two weeks! I was so dumb last year!” and that’s that.

But this year… I actually care.

But first we have Christmas! I honestly love Christmas! It usually means some snow, a crisp morning, hot chocolate, a great time with my family around the tree and gifts.

One thing it never means though – sleeping in… Not for me, not for my parents and not for my siblings.

As a kid I was usually too excited to be able to get much sleep and now my younger sibs’ wake me up because they’re too excited. Meanwhile, my parents catch a wink here or there because they were up long after us kids as they prepared the morning for us all.

But anyway, back to gifts: I love giving them. I like watching people open them, especially when I’ve over hyped their gift so much that it’s all they can think about. Yeah, it’s way too fun.

I like getting them too. Although I never give out a list anymore of the things I want. Why? Well, because if someone wants to give me something, then they’ll have actually thought the gift out and spent sometime picking the right one. That means way more to me than just checking off my wanted ads.

So, since it’s usually a thing to send out a Christmas newsletter, I’m going to share some of the stuff and gifts in my life right now.

Well… the biggest news, really, is that this wonderful person is now my girlfriend!

Yeah, she amazing. Because some of you don’t know her, let me just list a few things about her. I know I could spend the rest of this post going on about how wonderful she is, buuuuut – I won’t… how lame.

  1. She has a heart for the Lord.
  2. She is constantly teaching me new things.
  3. She’s beautiful.
  4. No matter what mood I’m in, she can cheer me up.
  5. She loves dogs.
  6. She makes great coffee!
  7. And even better chai lattes!
  8. She is exactly 9 months younger than me.

So there’s 8 things.

Here’s a picture of us the night I asked her to be my girlfriend.


Funny story, I planned to say something witty or poetic, but when it came down to it… I got so darn nervous I wasn’t sure if my tongue would even work. So I pretty much just looked her in the eyes and asked, “Would you be my girlfriend?” She was beaming when she said yes. That was pretty special.

Girlfriend, if you’re reading this, I thank the Lord for you and your family and I pray for you every day! This is a grand adventure we’re on!


My sister, The Polkadotted Plum, has a birthday tomorrow! So if you didn’t know, now you know. My gift to her is pretty awesome, if I do say so myself. I totally can’t wait for her to open it!


The 8th, which was last Tuesday, was my one year job anniversary, so…. yay me!

So yeah, lots of good stuff happening! I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas!



Hey people! Guess what – yes… I know it’s been a gajillion years since I posted… but enough about that!

For reals, tho – I finally joined Instagram! So now you can follow my idiosyncrasies there too!

How fun is that? Way cool.

Also… be forewarned – I Insta’ like I blog… (Read: not nearly enough)

And yes, Friday was yesterday, but Fashion blast! My manager, who is awesome, gave me the most legit’ coat the other day:

Be jealous:

IMG_3553 - Copy


Outdoorsy stuff

IMG_3503 - Copy

IMG_3516 - Copy

I spent some time on the other side of the mountains. Wonderful crisp mornings, made cheery by instant apple cider and/or coffee left over from the night before. (That stuff could wake hibernating bear and give him energy until summer) Long hikes early enough in the morning that I could watch the sunrise crest the cow trodden knolls. The silent and strangely alien-like wind turbines that populate the hills like huge sentinels.

IMG_20151019_075601 - Copy

I also got to see a lot of deer and other animals, like coyotes and bugs… lots of bugs. You couldn’t talk without getting a bug stuck in your teeth. Lots of extra protein I guess.

IMG_3518 - Copy It was good time.

– Cheers